Friday, August 17, 2012


Update: I found a good chiropractor!

After many years of semi-chronic fairly minor back problems I've been to several chiropractors. One was good. One was great. Several were terrible.

Lately I've had a run of bad ones and I wonder why the industry allows this to go on.

I don't believe that taking powdered flower pills, "3 times per week" chiro visits, watching videos, chanting mantras, or "really believing" will cause my joints to magically pop back into place, cure migraines, give me the energy of someone half my age, or cause me to levitate off the floor. I do believe that a good chiropractor can pop me back into position, that Triptans treat symptoms of migraines, eating right and exercising can give me energy, and that helicopters can make me levitate off the floor.

I don't need to wait for two hours in your lobby, sit through a twenty minute video, buy your herbs, have a two hundred dollar x-ray taken to result in a simple adjustment. I just need to be adjusted. To all the bad chiropractors out there, please just look at how I'm standing, know what the problem is, adjust it, and I'll see you next time. If you can't do that, then either you don't know how to do it, or you just want money. In either of those cases, I'll remove you from the "unknown" column and put you in the "bad" column and I'll move on to another one of the millions chiropractors on the planet.

This reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer pushes people over a trash can and they have their spine problems cured forever. No more "three times a week for the rest of your life". The chiropractor mafia enforcers show up with clubs and proceed to destroy his trash can.

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